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Posts Tagged ‘beauty’

I believe that beauty is relative. Everyone has different ideals, and we all have the right to decide on what we do about our own appearances. I personally have and eccentric sense of fashion that I suppose many would consider quite odd, and yet I’ve always believed that I’m entitled to wear whatever I consider attractive, regardless of popular opinion or whether or not it fits in with the latest trends. It’s for this reason that I go completely insane with irritation whenever someone thinks it’s acceptable to stick their noses into my business and question my personal fashion choices.

For instance, a few days ago I decided to wear heels to attend my university lectures. As my university requires a uniform, my shoes are pretty much the only thing I actually get to choose. I wanted to wear something unique and expressive, plus the heels were pretty adorable. It isn’t a crime to wear heels, but one of the other girls attending the same lecture decided to ask me why I wore heels. It was a harmless question, and if it had stopped there I wouldn’t have given it a second thought really. Except it didn’t stop there; she then continued to tell me that in her opinion, I shouldn’t wear heels because everyone else was wearing flats, and heels just “look weird”. It’s not just the heels, but she also went on to suggest I also change my hairstyle, and let my hair down like the rest of the girls, because “everyone has long silky hair and that’s what’s beautiful”. Well excuse me, but I don’t particularly care about what everyone else is wearing. It irks me somewhat that fashion has become a game of “who can be the fastest to follow”, when it really should be about expressing your individuality.

Although it is difficult to not take appearances into account when observing those around us, I still find it bothersome that physical appearance plays such an important role in the way we view others. When we first meet someone, before even getting to know them we subconsciously take in details regarding their appearance. We look at their gender, their skin, their features… As if recognising a person by their looks is the same as knowing who they are. I’m not going to go all the way to say that we are a bad race because we consider appearance instead of only looking at the personality or whatever. I’m just saying that there’s more to people than good looks. It’s perfectly fine to find certain people highly attractive, and other’s less attractive. It’s fine to notice what others are wearing, and to try to look good yourself. What’s NOT fine, however, is when you judge people solely based on their appearance, and what they’re wearing. What I really dislike is when my more… self-confident peers would judge strangers by what they’re wearing, and if the clothes they see are deemed tacky or if the person does not fit the requirements of “attractiveness”, the stranger is put in the forever-not-my-friend zone. When did friendship become about grabbing the most glamorous people? Mind you, this irritating phenomenon goes both ways. I find it equally annoying when my friends and I would walk past someone who’s stereo typically considered “pretty”, and one of my friends would snigger and say “I’d never be as dumb as her to waste so much time and money on make-up. I’ve got better things to do. I mean, I actually have a life.” I don’t appreciate this linkage of beauty and stupidity (and that’s putting it pretty lightly). Just because someone wants to look good, and puts some effort into their appearance so they can walk out feeling happy and confident, does not mean that they are shallow and that they don’t have things to do either. I’m not sure if this applies as much to the male population, but being a female I know first hand that this happens far too often. The real question though, is why do we do it? Why do we separate ourselves into different categories and discriminate against each other? It’s really unnecessary. We’re all gorgeous in our own ways (and I know some hater is probably going to say that’s too arrogant of me, because society is never pleased, but I genuinely believe it) and there’s no need to judge other people just because they don’t look exactly like you do. Put the gossip mag down, and let’s all get along.

Don’t change yourself to suit the preferences of others. Don’t think that you have to lose weight just because you think you have to look like a lingerie model to be beautiful. You don’t. If you want to lose weight, it should be because YOU want to have a healthier lifestyle, not because some jerk said you were chubby. There’s no need to starve yourself just because people can’t see your bones (those things are hidden under skin for a reason). Don’t feel like you need to spend ages on your make up and clothing just to please the eyes of people who frankly, don’t really matter. If you feel like having a chill day, and you just aren’t in the mood, then don’t bother. Go out wearing your old sweats; it’s all cool. Dressing up should be a fun thing. It should be something you do out of enjoyment, not something you do to hide yourself. Likewise, don’t feel scared to dress up either. If you happen to want to dress up and go crazy, then do it. There’s no need to worry about whether others will judge you, or about being considered shallow for putting a bit of eyeliner on. You aren’t shallow. It’s fun to dress up and put on something you think looks good. Sometimes that time spent getting ready in the morning can make the day seem even more exciting. It’s fun to stroll around feeling confident in your appearance. Nothing wrong with having fun.

I’m beginning to lose traction of what I’m going to say because there’s just so much going on, oops. I guess what I’m really trying to get across is that you shouldn’t take too much heed of what others are saying (unless they’re complimenting you, in which case you should most definitely take heed and give truthful compliments in return, because our world is sorely in need of genuine compliments right now). Fashion and beauty aren’t about dressing the way the magazine tells you to; it’s about expressing yourself and doing what makes you happy. So what if your favourite shirt doesn’t fit with the latest trends. So what if everyone’s into classy chiffon and you still love wearing vintage skirts. In my opinion, fashion should have only one rule: if you like it, wear it. There’s more than one type of beauty. As long as you love what you’re wearing, walk with your head held high and eyes shining with confidence, you’ll look amazing.

Bottom line: do what makes you happy.

Whatever you’re doing, as long as you’re happy (and abiding with the law, because we’re all law abiding citizens ;]) then you’re probably don’t something right. Life is too short to worry about what Vogue says.

Be happy guys. You’re all lovely, beautiful people.

And on that note, adios!

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Now, I’m not one who enjoys talking badly of my friends (or anyone, actually), but there are certain people on this planet, who I think take self-modesty a tad too seriously… To the point where it becomes self loathing.

Before I begin, let me give you a brief background on what I’m talking about. In general, there are two types of modest people. The type who are modest because they want attention (you know, the type who purposely say bad things about themselves so other people can shower them with praise), and the type who are modest because they genuinely think they aren’t good enough.

I couldn’t care less about the ones who crave attention – whatever their intentions are don’t matter to me. I’m talking about the people who really aren’t happy with themselves.

I’ve got a friend who is constantly criticising herself. She’s either too thin or too fat, too pale or too tan. In class she’s under the misconception that no matter how hard she tries, she can never be as good as the top tier students. Like me, she aspires to write, but she doesn’t dare to start because she’s afraid her work wouldn’t be as good as she hopes. She believes her life is going nowhere. Well, of course it isn’t – not with that attitude!

I know I sound harsh and uncaring, but it irritates me to see people so displeased with themselves. We’re all different, and each of us is amazing in our own ways. Perhaps you aren’t as attractive as the people in the magazines. Perhaps you don’t have the best grades in class. But what does it matter? Why let it get to you? We have our own strengths and weaknesses, and it’s not the outside that matters, it’s – cheesy as it may sound – the inside. If we all moped about all day, and mourned over what we lacked, would we have come this far as a race? No. J.K. Rowling wouldn’t have created Harry Potter if she’d been too afraid of failure to write. Steve Jobs wouldn’t have created Apple if he’d been afraid to try. Insecurity happens to all of us, but we must overcome it, and look at the bright side. We’re all so perfectly imperfect, so why waste time crying over what we can’t be, when we should be focusing on what we can be?

I’m beginning to lose track of what I’m saying now… All this emotion is confusing me. Basically, I know this is a cheesy, sensitive post. But I honestly believe that all of you are wonderful, awesome people, and you should be proud! I know I’m completely weird and crazy, but I don’t care. It’s who I am, and I’m proud of it. So to all of you insecure people out there: YOU’RE FINE.

Adios!

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